Janum Moondi, 28, London, Occupation: Fantasist and bovinocoprotics consultant. Religion: Witchcraft. Mission: Wasting life writing nonsense. Blog contains: News and Alternative views. Lies. Societally Cancerous Nihilism. Existentialist Thought turds. Wordiness and Faggotry. LIEK. LICKING.. SALT.. Keywords.. Social Media Expert Advice... Mastery of the Ellipsis... Unicorn Breeding Tips... Vegan Cuisine with Bacon.
And the way you're wiffle-waffling, I doubt I ever will.
What the hell is the matter with you people?
Have you no eyes or ears?
Are you drugged with
* something in the water* or just plain dim?
Or just too bloody nice, middle class and moderate for your own good?
Honest, ro read your comments
( and WORSE ) to read the articles that inspire them! ) one would imagine that it's Satan himself under discussion!
All I can say is that for a heathen, helot, harlot, heretic lot you do cling tenaciously to the the theory of the bogeyman ( the Devil in the form of Nick Griffin ) is out to get you.)
* Oooh! That horibble BNP! I just can't imagine how ANYONE can vote for them!"
Are you all too thick to see that all the horrors that you predict the BNP would do if in office are ALREADY being inflicted upon you?
Well, be honest, all the horrors, and a damned good lot that the BNP have never even thought of!
You are ruled by professional politicians, quangocrats, thuggish and murderous police, bin Gestapo, Muslim madmen and a myriad other petty tyrants who rule over you in the precise manner of a foreign, hostile occupying power.
What with your rulers, and their masters The Franco-German Axis, we are nothing. We are serfs, and those who still work are milch cow serfs, whose duty it is to pay and shut you mouth.
AND YOU'RE FREETTING ABOUT WHAT THE BNP MIGHT DO WITH/TO YOU?
ANYTHING THAT THEY CAN THINK OF IS ALREADY BEING DONE TO YOU!
Are you mad?
Your rulers, for that it what they are, not representatives but rulers, are dirty to the core ; the have no morals, no honesty no probity, and have shed all responsibility to unaccountable bodies.
They are a dirty, useless, corrupt and incompetent white elephant, serving no useful purpose whatosever.
But you, nice middle class/honest working class/whatever class still believe that despite how rotten your rulers are, you have to go on being oh-so-moderate, and oh-so-law abiding.
Your rulers act dirty, so YOU act dirty.
Swallow you nice, but lethal, reticence and vote for a dirty party, the BNP.
You don't/can't do that?
So what ARE you going to do about being dragged ever deeper into slavery?
Carry on being nice and law abiding, and vote for Cameron?
I repeat ; are you MAD?
There is one thing, and one thing ONLY that will shake your rulers to the core, and that's for millions of people to vote for the dirtiest party that they can find.
Do you imagine that ANYTHING else that you do will make the slightest difference?
Do you think and ANY of them even read our scribblings on this, our Democracy Wall?
And even if they did send some flunkey to do it for them them, do you believe that our opinions would make one iota of difference?
DO YOU?
You have been conned, lied to, bullied, criminalised, browbeaten for decades under a thoroughly rotten political system ; and you STILL go on deluding yourselves that any party, any faction, anybody or any body that's part and parcel of the rottenness will change ANYTHING.
They won't until they get the shock of their lives, when the headlines tell them that millions intend to vote for extremist parties.
How else are you going to get the message across that you don't any longer want ANY of them ruling over you?
What can you do? Even the opposition is always bought. When will Anarchism be realised? When the power of love overcomes the love of power? Why ain't this front on the BBC?
Email from textualecstasy@gmail.com to editorial@dailymailonline.co.uk, j.tozer@dailymail.co.uk - reply to be added if received.
Could you explain why the Daily Mail felt the need to photoshop the tattoo from Ms. Becky Doughty's arm on Page 25 of your Tuesday November 10th 2009 edition? It is disturbing. Does the Daily Mail consider having a tattoo to make one less respectable and deserving of public sympathy?
The CV of Janum Moondi "I'm not lazy long term unemployed benefit scum. I'm an enterprising, creative and socially responsible individual seeking a job I can do with my eyes closed and mp3 player in, paying more than £26,000 a year and not full of douchebags who make me want to slit my wrists in less than six months..."
01.08 - 05.08 - MagickMoments &; MagickTea - Managing Partner - failed business, china earthquake, paypal screwed us over, the banks were wankers and small business advice useless...etc
09.07 - ongoing - TextualEcstasy – Webmaster/Sole Tradership - Successful writing site, in terms of profit over loss, no community whatsoever though, running about £30 a year profit for posting my thoughts and awful poetry and letting others do same. Closed due to poverty of not affording £10 a month.
11.06 - 01.08 - Barking College - Student mentor – part time. Retired for raising the issue that an English student couldn't spell the word English properly, i.e. with an "E" instead of an "I" as in "Inglish".
03.06 - 10.06 - Langrish House Hotel - Assistant manager 3* country hotel. Resigned for sake of grace after being worked into nervous exhaustion and rumbled for smoking a foot long joint after every shift.
11.05 - 01.06 - The Cranbrook - Assistant bar manager city centre pub. Sacked by alcoholic landlord (is there any other kind?) for being lazy. which is so ironic it's just funny... Enjoy your liver diseases you fat nasty bitch.
07.05 - 11.05 - Towngate Personnel - Waiter & barman for 2 hotels. Fucking hated being stuck in middle of Derbyshire. Left abruptly.
11.04 - 07.05 - Mosaica Restaurants - Chef-de-partie, grill section. Sacked for using fellow employee link to buy weed just after Boss had taken select staff members for dirty Amsterdam weekend tasting the mushrooms and rocking the ganj... the kitchen that smokes together...
03.04 - 10.04 - Solicitors-on-Call - Secretarial tasks, also web design. Two bit strange operation. Supposedly revolutionary in terms of providing legal advice but failing on every level. My work now turned into some flash enabed nightmare which is a search engine disaster. 0908 companies eh? Sheesh...
12.03 - 02.04 - Various Temping - Skills gained in office and admin functions. Exploited like hell or ignored and paid O.K. interesting but unstable. No likey...
03.02 - 10.03 - Compass Catering - Managed corporate hospitality bar. Most awesome job on Earth. Not even a job. Wonderful people, wonderful work, wedding bar management - typical - made redundant after Ford closed the site.
06.01 - 03.02 - Sporadic Temping - Large range of skills gained in catering. Blergh. how dry do you like your Jam sponge madam? oh you just died? fucking nursing homes... wahhhh
08.00 - 06.01 - Cybergate - PC training, cybercafe admin, sales/repair. Sacked for not having tits, being blonde eastern european and taking £3.50 an hour. Fairy nuff.
03.99 - 06.00 - Initial/West Ham Hosp - Kiosk manager with staff of seven. Up the fucking hammers. Good stuff.
Education
School from 09.95 to 06.97
Economics (B), English Lang (B), English Lit (B), Geography (B),
Maths (B), C.D.T(C), Science x2 (CC), French (B), Art (A)
College from 09.97 to 06.00
Politics (C), Economics (D) A-levels / English (B), English Law (B) AS-Levels
University from 09.00 to 06.01
Progression from first year to second of Government & Politics BA left cause of family trauma which has contributed to blighting my mental health and therefore life for last 7 years... over now though :)
University from 09.01 to 06.05
2:1 LLB in English Law - well, not really, i didn't do the last exam cause i couldn't be bothered and my head wasn't in the right space. But... I get alumni stuff and apparently got a 2;1. Which is nice... but yes, degrees, ain't worth nothing anymore. Believe me I know. I don't even care if I have one or not.
Notable Skills
Audio Typing (50wpm copy/80wpm Audio) / M$ Word, Excel, Outlook, Powerpoint / Photoshop / Dreamweaver / Hard-coding Html / Fireworks / Flash / CMS - Joomla, Wordpress, Drupal / Elementary Php and Mysql / Audio and Video Software / Proof-reading and Creative Writing / Legal and Political processes and Current Affairs / Communicating plainly with exemplary literacy and numeracy skills / Online Marketing and Search Engine Optimisation / Open source productivity and knowledge management software and processes / Spliff and Rick Rolling / Nihilistic Poetry / Expressions of internal angst / KNOWING WHAT THE ILLUMINATI ARE UP TO AND WRITING IN CAPITALS
My addiction ruined my life. I lost friends, I lost jobs, I lost my family. In short I lost everything I ever cared about. It was all replaced by my favourite Drug. Nothing else mattered.
I remember first taking that drug, when I was happily taking up the post of Branch Secretary at the Union of Communication Workers
Imagine! Me! A little postman from Hull representing the industry and the workers of the Post Office. I never felt so alive before!
That was the gateway. What came next was much worse. I was always a Marxist... I always believed the state should be the sole driving force behind peple's lives...
And then I knew I was hooked on the drug. it was a kind of black magick. I lost all perspective.
People listened to me like my words mattered. I was Respected. I was Admired. I was Important. I could send a memo out about stationary in the morning, and within only a couple of months the post it note colours would miraculously change.
It was like my mind had expanded and a glorious new age of possibilities were opened up to me by the drug.
I knew it couldn't get any better. The media were phoning me. I had secretaries and lots of offices. I had ministerial transport and more expenses than I could spend! It was like I was living in another world, surrounded by the proletarian walking corpses, but not of their world. I was in my own perfect drugged bubble.
It was too perfect and it couldn't last.
On November Fifth 2009 the bubble burst as parliament was stormed by a cadre of lbertarian and other bloggers foaming at the mouth against "The Establishement". I was taken from my offices and thrown in the street and both laughed at by some and ignored by most.
I got my fix for a while by ordering around the Pigeons in Trafalger square. Yet they seldom listened. Then I moved onto arranging specks of dirt between my legs into marching patterns and I imagined that I was ordering last legions of manly dirt speck soldiers to fight one another to death, all upon my command.
Later on some man came along and offered me coffee. i was cold, but I was still under the influence of the druug, so I barked at him: "mocha whip Latte! Extra cinnamon! No sugar!"
He just smiled. Then he spoke. "I think you have an addicion to power don't you Alan?"
Then it all became clear. I had wasted my life. Turned all the hope of my youth into a hopeless despair caused by drug addiction.
I turned to the nice man and asked him: "how did I end up this way"?
He told me. He said: "It's simple enough Alan...
... you're a massive fucking cunt."
After that I faced up to my addiction and life slowly started to get better.
I am Sick of People.
I am Sick of Men. Idiots who would fight on any point of Pride yet cower and dither over any point of Principle.
I am Sick of Women. Sycophants to emotion and appearance yet despisers of logic and substance.
I am Sick of the Genders being pitted against each other by quangoes, government initiatives and the media.
I am Sick of Homosexuals assuming themselves superior, liberated or special.
I am Sick of Hetrosexuals and Homosexuals moaning about their sex lives or bragging about them.
I am Sick of Asexuals going on about how unhappy they are.
I am Sick of Bisexuals claiming everyone is a little bisexual.
I am Sick of Sex in general. As a marketing device, as a concept, and as a "spiritual wormhole". It's all bullshit.
I am Sick of Pornography. It hardly even sublimates the physical urge, let alone the emotional one and demeans men as much as it does women.
I am Sick of Consuming.
I am Sick of Coffee. Drinking it and drinking it.... No extra energy to show.
I am Sick of Tea. Weak and dreary... reminiscent of every family morning.
I am Sick of Alcohol. Never enough then suddenly, so suddenly, far too much.
I am Sick of Chocolate. Teeth ringing sugary fallacious consumption for the sake of it.
I am Sick of Cigarettes. Rolling them, lighting them, smelling of them.
I am Sick of Cannabis. Knowing it will cheer me. Knowing I will have to get more, to even begin to tolerate let alone enjoy others company.
I am Sick of Take-Aways. Chinese, Indian, Pizza, Fish'n'Chips. Overeating.
I am Sick of Fruit and Vegetables. Even Peas. Even Mangoes.
I am Sick of Milk. Full of pus, toxins, metals and anti-biotics. Still I drink it.
I am Sick of Art.
I am Sick of Listening to Music. If it's good I can't take it, and if its bad I can't take it.
I am Sick of Writing. No truth can be conveyed without someone getting it for themselves and no beauty can be created some cunt won't shit on. Fuck it.
I am Sick of Images. Everywhere, pre-meditated design, I see straight through it.
I am Sick of Conversation. Cliche, being compartmentalised, breeze shooting shit and promises that are forgotten as soon as said.
I am Sick of Politics. Dumbed down and full of hatred and diversion. A game of bottomless deception.
I am Sick of Activism. Petitions, protests, planning. False hope, false fronts, false people, all seeking their enclave building their own gravy trains over others graves.
I am Sick of Cooking. It's never perfect and always lacking some vital ingredient I can't afford.
I am Sick of Reading. Sifting through 99.9% of garbage to find one jewel only to rip it to shreads with my horrible head.
I am Sick of Unemployment.
I am Sick of Employment. Expecting to be used, expecting to be stiffed on pay, expecting to be sacked despite every best effort.
I am Sick of Bullshit Job-ad's. I will not work for commission, I will not pay £50 for training or a CRB. I will not sell fake charity or alcohol or gambling chips.
I am Sick of Job-Seekers Allowance. Being told to seek jobs that are not there and consider work-training for free. Being patronised with numeracy and spelling tests. Living in constant fear of the next "mistake" they'll make.
I am Sick of Credentialism. Oh the pride of the "Mixologist"! Oh the theory that a cartel for lawyers is a good idea. oh the theory lawyers are a good idea!
I am Sick of the "work hard" fallacy. Yeah, they notice, they notice and give you more and more till you choke, breakdown, and lose it. Then they call you lazy. Then fire you.
I am Sick of Fucking Wonks who believe everyone could and should have a job, just like they do, paying thousands a week for doing fuck all of worth.
I am Sick of Morons looking down on me because they have a career in refuse administration whilst I can't afford my own electric cause I'm "Overqualified" for everything I'm not not Qualified enough for!
I am Sick of Never getting a reply. Not even a "fuck off", "you suck" or "what the fuck were YOU thinking applying for this". Nothing. Fuck all.
I am Sick of Reading Ad's. "hungry for success", "detail oriented", "bright and bubbley", they never want misanthropic personalityless smartarses do they? Cunts.
I am Sick of Myself.
I am Sick of My Skin that burns and freckles in the merest hint of sunlight.
I am Sick of My Hair that itches, curls, never stays neat, looks shit whether bald or long.
I am Sick of My Teeth that can't take Heat, Cold, Sweetness, Acidity, that are full of mercury, that feel like they constrict my tounge.
I am Sick of My Hands. Cold, useless, withering in age and yellowing with time.
I am Sick of My Feet. Huge, sweaty, smelly. Ungraceful, inelegant, shoe breaking behomoth motherfuckers.
I am Sick of My Eyesight. Dying more and more, dangerous to re-laser, ugly to frame and hold together with glasses.
I am Sick of My Nose. Snotty, sniffing, superglue booger making fucking mess maker.
I am Sick of My Lungs. Aching, shadowey, foreboding unshiftable gnomes with a hoe digging criss-crosses into their insides.
I am Sick of My Stomache. Fat, blobby, eternally ungrateful churning and making strange noises, so quickly full and so quickly empty.
I am Sick of Living.
I am Sick of Seeing my mother cry. Knowing theres nothing I can do, that now, nothing will really ever be good enough for her.
I am Sick of Hearing my father bitch. Is this all family is? Is this all Love is? An expected self-applied millstone? Can't you tell me something good?
I am Sick of The kids knowing utterly fucking everything and being sucktioned to the TV with any hope of removing them bound to end up in hatred.
I am Sick of Watching my mouth. What kind of shit shop is this where only I say "thank you"? Turn that fucking shit off I'm trying to daydream! How am I? I'm sweet as a fucking nut. how are you?
I am Sick of Trying to be Grateful. Yeah. So lucky not a starving african. So lucky you only got raped not vegetablissed, so lucky you only got vegetableised not dead. Give me a fucking break. Then I'll be grateful.
I am Sick of Going outside. Streets filled with shit, both human and inhuman, woodland where people GRAFFITTI THE FUCKIN TREES, City Centres where most seem to take a point of pride in how hard they can smack into your shoulder while walking past.
I am Sick of Staying inside making nests of blankets, worrying about electric, "treating" myself to the heater and depressing myself with Media.
I am Sick of Dreaming of a better life, a more meaningful life, a happier life, a life in general. No business, no organisation, no collaboration can shift it. Even the dream of nothingness is tainted.
I am Sick of Consciousness the illusion of choice, amongst the free will of either being used or being a user, a beauty that is always hated, spat upon, and derided. The Majority is always right.
I am Sick, yet I see all those who would wish various solutions upon me, and I see they are even Sicker still then I.
A sincere misery is better than any insincere beauty.
I've come to the conclusion, three years after trying to start EveryonesHome.org.uk - Which turned into the present ShelterCrisis.referata.com Site - that there's no point trying to:
1. Engage in the homelessness sector in any positive political way. I shall stick to soup, socks, fags and conversation from now on.
2. Try and work against the common fallacy that government can solve a housing crisis with social housing when government's manipulation of the economy by design produced the crisis of Shelter in the first place.
3. Build a better directory of services and statistics that shows this truth.
Sorry Shelter but I don't agree.
I won't be signing your call for increased socialisation of the property market. We should be able to build homes, earn our keep, afford, for ourselves. Not have to continualy lobby for more government funding or become their wards of public charity just because we are common enough to be poor and not capable of week-to week affording iniquitous rents caused by government after government allowing uncontrolled immigration, buy to let speculators, NIMBY planning controls and a re-funneling of our life's work into taxes, taxes, taxes and the Bank's annual profit divided bonuses.
I have spoken to nearly a thousand people about this issue, hundreds of 'ostensibly' homeless persons and my friends and family. So few of those I spoke to actually receiving payment from working in this 'field' get the fact that government is the problem and not the solution.
They think if only we could get the powers that be to come on side and give an extra £7-8 billion pounds into social housing we could cure homelessness. Yet even in such a budget ballooning hypothetical they forget - the bricks and mortar needed is 75% already in place.
Homeless people mostly understand how it is. Their self-appointed representatives to government and people on the behalf of charity, social enterprise, community groups either cast them as victims or villains. Yet all of us homeless or not without power share that common bond... socially we pay the price for the central economic myth - that the government can ever make anything. It cannot. It can only steal.
If the government committed exclusively to fulfilling anyone's mortgage/rent who could not afford to service it's payments what would happen?
In my opinion the entire property market would crash and the country would be irreparably bankrupted.
Maybe that's what the guys at Shelter are really working on. Socialism is like a dirty stalking horse hidden in the homelessness sector. True cheap workable campaigns for the legal changes and structural government changes necessary to completely end the possibility of 'needing to be homeless' are very, very thin on the ground...
... and I think for the precise reason why socialist reliance on government to solve homelessness is so prevalent within the Quangoocracy of it all is the fact it's a simple message to swallow:
1. Homelessness is Homeless People's Fault. 2. The Government hasn't the money or will to help them. 3. Let's bitch at the Government to solve it! (Profit?)
yet the truth is more complex.
1. Government guarantees continuance of feudal rentier landowning economy amongst the elite of the country. 2. Government gives Shelter 21% of funding it needs to provide services. Shelter bitches so government can claim it needs more money to 'end homelessness' 3. Both profit from the partnership. Housing advice line demand goes up. The Director can sleep easy knowing their expenses will be paid by consumption taxes of the little people they couldn't give a shit about whilst rents can continue to rise, mortgages foreclose, and banks receive massive profit from peoples dream to just have a little quarter acre of semi-detached property within which they can feel 'at home'.
It's all bullshit. In between this central controversy, the true tragedy isn't that people die of cold in the UK every winter, (anywhere up to 32 a year on previous personal research), the true tragedy is that too many people will never live having any stabiity or dignity with it's provision by someone else.
Easy come, easy go, social housing is not the answer. Affordable homes will be produced by local reform and capital investment for long term sustainable profits. It will not be produced by The governemnt subsidising Wimpy homes to build 2 million more shitty units in shitty areas with no jobs and then the government paying the rents on behalf of everyone.
Those that can give you everything, can also take it away, even quicker.
I am done for a very long time on this subject. Not only the complicity of charity makes me sick, but so does the entire subject of homelessness. I tried and I failed. That's O.K. The real stinker now is that I give up and I don't care.
I leave http://ShelterCrisis.referata.com in the capable hands of the internets. Homeless Link were approached for being given the system, along with Shelter, Crisis, Communities and Local Government. Not a monkies ass was given for the ability of individuals to find out more easily what was out there to help them and a structural analysis to help others.
So fuck em. Let them roll around in their own sophistic and "think of the poor homeless lady" rhetoric whilst they continue making sure along with the government that everyone is legally homeless, and roofless with just the mis-swipe of a bureaucrats mouse.
Anti-hate laws are designed to PROVOKE A REACTION, not quell it, just as the case where the Muslim leaders in Europe can call for jihad openly, but people like Nick Griffin get thrown in jail for even pointing this out.
People recognize this. The easiest way to alienate a group is to give them privileges over all others.
If you wanted to alienate people from caring about poverty in their own areas - a ten point manifesto (always a dangerous device) - is one way to help it. Such things help create and advance Anti-poverty laws. One such anti-poverty agenda is the "Ending rough Sleeping and Homelessness by 2012 and 2020" respectively, agenda, an agenda promoted by the Quango Homeless Link. It doesn't do much to help homelessness be ended as a fact for people, but more strides towards a false consensus of endless social housing growth.
The fact is the feeling of homelessness will rise in direct proportion to the implementation of this agenda. Because it works to cast in stone the market failure of over regulated housing which leads to most homelessness whilst trading on the natural sympathies most people feel towards the classical image of "A Homeless Guy/Girl".
If you can force the stereotype homeless into boxes they do not want by law and co-opted voluntary group, the everyday more hidden homeless stand no chance of a fairer deal. This is the writing between the lines of infinitely reasonable sounding stupid shit herein refuted:
Commit to the goal of ending homelessness in the UK within three terms of government. Reform homelessness law to ensure that all homeless people, including former rough sleepers, are entitled to a decent settled home.
[And so the dialectic is born, entitled to a decent settled home? when a) not everyone wants a home b) not everyone deserves a home, c) no-one can BE entitled to a home in a system where people own land, rather than people belonging to a land. Our legal system is completely averse to the principle of 'entitlement' to land/property. The work of thousands in ensuring provision is made for those unable to compete in the property market by government is in danger of being made a mockery of when large amounts of people are homeless due to simple gatekeeping/ignorance practices on the part of local and national authorities.Meanwhile wonks from quangos and government plutocrats have a party over their massaged statistics. It's quite simple: Puke making.]
2 Housing supply and allocation
Invest to meet housing need in full, especially the need for settled accommodation for people in hostels, B&B hotels and other forms of temporary accommodation. Ensure that homeless people receive a fair share of affordable housing.
[The weakest argument in the wateriest of possible terminology with no mention of the limited nature of land, housing, social provision compared to demand and sustainability of cost. It is government pretending along with charity to be the answer to a social problem that government is directly responsible for that is the most galling, Machiavellian and disingenuous facet of the whole "Ending homelessness" agenda. It's tokenism gone mad.Are we to become a two-tier population? The proles in social housing being the whipping boys of an ignorant and angry working populace? Affordable housing is NOT created by state subsidy and charity. It is DESTROYED by these mechanisms. ]
3 Working together to prevent homelessness
Make sure government departments at all levels work together effectively and with the voluntary sector to prevent homelessness. Protect and enhance the Supporting People funding programme to allow flexibility in preventing and tackling homelessness.
[The supporting people funding program is creating the biggest underclass of state wards ever envisaged. It is a monstrous self-responsibility and potential sucking machine worth billions to public and private sector alike. It is the prime example of applying cock-eyed market theories to what are essential last resorts of local counci action to protect the weak and vulnerable from themselves and others. It is the ultimate sub-contracting of social responsibility that is taking place and does nothing to address homelessness, only rooflessness.]
4 Health
Ensure that health strategies at all levels recognise the needs of homeless people. Direct all NHS trusts to ensure that homeless people can access health care and are never discharged from hospitals onto the streets.
[Liaison growth between the NHS and Homelessness services is non-existant barr a few central London hospitals to my limited research so far. An easier option would be that social service departments were not so stressed and inefficient that they could not be directing some care for discharges from hospitals who are homeless - however - as it's not the NHS's focus to be a bed and breakfast service for the homeless.]
5 Full citizenship
Ensure that homeless people benefit from the full range of citizens’ rights offered through involvement, consultation and democratic participation. Introduce a ‘service passport’ for homeless people so they can continue to receive services wherever they move.
[The problem is - they already are full citizens - but being 'a citizen' doesn't count for much. Social mobility is important. It's why non-market housing is a bad idea in general - it stultifies Social Mobility. Which is completely to the contra of the main message of this organisation - More money, More services, More paperwork, More control. The "democratic participation" in most supported housing projects is rightly the focus of much quiet ridicule among staff. Democracy cost money to enforce, and next to nothing to truly practice, guess which version is being imagined here?]
6 Focus on multiple needs
Promote effective integrated services for homeless people who have multiple needs, especially for former entrenched rough sleepers and those who are still sleeping rough.
[Entrenched rough sleepers either need areas of tolerance and security for their rough sleeping, or imprisonment, there are too many homeless persons who spend all day begging and bemoaning whilst being used as 'sympathy fodder' for the collection plates of various institutions. It's a big merry money go round where nothing ever seems to change and the tokenism and caterwauling drowns out any chance for progress on the true economic and cultural causes of homelessness. You can integrate services until everyone has their own government guardian angel running their lives. Rough sleeping is a reaction against sustained homelessness where someone thinks: "Fuck it then, the world entire has to be my home, I will sleep here in my clothes." You're not going to either bitch them, or kick them off the streets, because they have no-where else that feels like home.]
7 Welfare benefits, work and training
Reform the benefits system to end the poverty trap. Introduce a New Deal for homeless people to support their efforts towards independence through study, volunteering, training, work or enterprise.
[Yeah. The New Deal is great. It's working for me. I'm going to sign t'off t'dole and kill myself anydays I reckon,... Statistical success all round!]
8 Drugs and alcohol
Create integrated housing and treatment pathways for homeless people who are dependent on drugs and/or alcohol.
[Favour addicts over the sober individuals? Here's a radical idea - why not leave them the fuck alone and have some equality? Addicted or not - if everyone is 'entitled' to a home - why should Charlie Crackhead be any better than anyone else? What about drug law reform? What about ibogaine? What about saving and making money, rather then spending and wasting money?]
9 Cultural rights
Recognise that homeless people have the same talents, creative potential, expressive power and right to take part in cultural life as any citizen. Invest in cultural programmes that help people to overcome trauma, rediscover self-esteem, co-operate with others and reintegrate with society.
[Well it creates jobs picking people up, rather then stopping them, needing to be kicked down the social hierarchy in the first place I suppose. Why do folks 'leave society' in the first place? Could it be it sucks? Hmmmm?]
10 Refugees, asylum seekers, migrant workers
Improve homelessness services for asylum seekers and refugees so that no one is roofless. Ensure that refugees can access the housing and support they need to build new secure lives. Improve advice and help to access accommodation for homeless people from the EU accession states.
[Refugees, asylum seekers, migrant workers are largey the useful idiots of an internationalist agenda to divide people's globally to better facilitate the envisioned 'total control model' of a coming out from the shadows - world government.
Asyum Seekers should be sent back. We are not a utopia for the world's troubed hotspots.
Migrant Workers should be regulated back across the border for all instances if we have a skills shortage as a result - so be it. You can't increase demand for domestic workers whilst you have such a numerical profit, rather than, qualitiative profit based outlook on national economics.
Refugees should be referred back to the first country of safety. What refuge do British Citizens have? They are extradited to America on whims, and given and left with questionable EU governments on a nod and a wink. You can't help homelessness with a bank cheque for Refugees, Migrant Workers and Asylum Seekers, because in a world of Seven Billion people and a country of 60 million, 30 million beyond it's own sustainability level...
How does inculcating the idea of provision for conceptualy the rest of the world to migrate to England - help English people access shelter's and social housing when necessary?
It doesn't. It's just a nice way to make the problem worse, whist caiming - ever so slowly to make it better - all the while indebting our children more for the inhabiting of land and property which is already ours and has already been paid for. Yet it's just such a cuddly, multicultural, utopian, airy fairy nonsense pie - who are we to resist it?]
Self-interest is the motivating force of human nature. It ensures that we almost always "look out for number one" ahead of other considerations. Self-interest on the part of those who have large amounts of money and power in modern Western society is a primary reason dialectics is not taught or widely discussed.
It is not in the short-term interest of the rich and powerful to promote or support widespread knowledge of dialectics. The reason for this is very simple - while the dialectical process eventually leads to Utopia for all, the lives of the rich and powerful are already close enough to Utopia (as they imagine it) to discourage anything that could lead to changes in the existing system. "If it ain't broke, don't fix it" is their attitude, and they naturally take a dim view of ideas which empower the general population to align themselves with change.
If enough people were to become aware of dialectics and its implications, many of them would be encouraged to stop consciously resisting change and progress, and the political and economic climate of the world would be affected as a result. While these changes would be inherently progressive and therefore good for a vast majority of people, they would not be good for the rich and powerful during their own lifetimes. Many would lose some portion of their wealth as people became increasingly conscious of the trend toward economic justice and equality and aligned themselves with it.
However, the rich and powerful of society should not be viewed from a one-sided, non-dialectical viewpoint which suggests that they are exclusively regressive. While they do contribute to regression by discouraging functional philosophy such as dialectics and promoting its antithesis - static conservatism, it should be noted that they simultaneously fuel progress in other ways, such as by being heavily involved in technological advancement. From a dialectical viewpoint, no person, group, idea, or action is ever exclusively "one way or the other." A single action or person can produce opposing results in different contexts.
Since the rich and powerful have a tremendous degree of control over cultural and social institutions such as the media and the schools, it is easy to see how knowledge of dialectics could be widely ignored in our society. Those "at the top" are not involved in some sort of organized conspiracy to keep this knowledge from us. Their short-term understanding of self-interest simply gives them no reason to promote or support it. This is basic human nature.
However, at least for the moment, the matter is partially out of their hands. The progressive freedom of information made possible by the Internet allows dialectics to be taught on an independent basis, as this articles does.
Conclusions
Dialectics is the study of the nature of change.
There is one reality, but the human mind makes distinctions within that reality for survival purposes.
Things (distinctions) do not exist independently, but are dependent on other things (distinctions) for meaning.
Things are made distinct by being opposed to other things, even though all things are united at a deeper level.
The interaction of one thing (thesis) with its opposite in a given context (antithesis) creates a new thing, the synthesis.
A synthesis is a new thesis with its own antithesis, making the process of change continuous.
Syntheses move in the direction of increasing complexity, which is interpreted by the human mind over long time scales as "progress."
Progress is continuous but not linear. It relies on setbacks and reversals to move forward in the long run. "3 steps forward, 2 steps back."
The most regressive, tragic, and destructive short-term conflicts, such as wars, often move progress forward very rapidly in later years.
If we avoid total self-extinction, dialectical thought predicts that human society will eventually achieve Utopia.
Dialectics is not well-known in the modern Western world because of misuse by communist rulers and self-interest on the part of current rulers.
The Internet creates an opportunity to make people aware of dialectics on an independent, community-driven basis.
In a disgustingly unexplored social development from the worldwide mega depression (or as worldwide governments are calling it: "A little economic blip downturn thing nothing a couple of generations tax receipts in advance can't solve"), Previously Tee-Total non-drinking Cannabis addicts are turning up in Accident and Emergency units by the thousands causing pandemonium and a general strain on health services.
Nurse Oguwgogo of King George's Hospital, Essex told us that: "Drunks! In A&E, never so problem before credit crunch. Every night crowd of drunk bleeding ganja-lovers shouting "If only I could have got a spliff I wouldn't be here!" cuddle together stupid think of one more dealer they no already try.”
We asked several such individuals about their circumstances. In particular Steve Bunit, also of Essex told us exclusively and in the strictest confidence: "The situations critical man, It's £20 on the two gram cheese these days, and man's can't afford no even a night time smoke every day of the week on basic man's JSA salary init? The market is breaking down. Some geezers are actually having to bother growing it themselves now."
When reached for comment, the Minister for Fun was unavailable, however we noted related action from the Minister, Ms. Beverly Berrygood on the official ministry website was to commission a study into whether alcohol prices should rise, chaired by the Muslim Council of Britain, the Methodist Temperance Movement Worldwide, The Police Force, and Starbucks inc.
Chancey Pufpass of the Legalise Cannabis Alliance told us: "This is all part of an orchestrated and deeply ugly agenda to turn humanity into slaves of THE MAN and cut down on anything that isn't to do with working or going to the shops for fun" however, we do here at this publication fear he was high at the time of the quotation.
Ignorance is bliss they say, and innocence is simply acceptable ignorance, it seems as though and the things I see when I look into people lately are incredibly frightening. Almost hypnotically immobilising. Want bed now kind of stuff. "What the fuck are you talking about Child?" you may ask... well...
Spiritism, sagacity, sights unseeable until you at first feel. Feeling brings too much fear. Feeling good, feeling bad, if you got it you fear to lose it, if you ain't you fear to have it, or never have it again.
Yet as this blog of mine has gone on at length to convince itself in some way - feeling is apparently not a goal or gift in itself yet a tool. I'm not striving for buddhist indifference. I'm seeking buddhist control and nonchalance certainly.
If you look across a sea of people long enough, the colours will move, humours transfer yet in all quarters in a crowd whatever it is doing or "feeling" whether happy dancing or angry marching - the result is the same. A noxious overwhelming fume of black energy releases.
Oh and it's probably a great thing that happens and I don't know, but for so long it's been creeping up, more and more. I can't deal with it. I don't want to and I don't have to. I wonder if these sight beyond sight is a reflection of my own mental state. How I never had 'a tribe', 'a scene', or a close nexus to belong to. Growing up I wasn't even good enough to be in with the outcasts. I was in with the outcasts from the outcast crew. At university I spent four years ignoring everyone. Which in retrospect I can't even say I regret.
Us white English devils up in the northern hemisphere worshipped primarily the Sun, back before religion was turned from a community introspection into some kind of organised bloodbath of lifes eternal celebration. Meanwhile our tanned and dark Arab, Black whatever devil breathern nearer the equator primarily before Christian Era - worshipped the Moon.
All as a symbol of G-d's greatness and love you understand. Not the Rock or helium itself. Durrr.
Predictably based on perspective see? Yet not dis-affirming to the point of it all, which is the celebration time in the Cold North, was when the Sun came and heated life up. And the celebration time in the Hotter regions were when the Moon would show it's face and the day's most searing heat subside.
What is Islam's symbol? The Cresent Moon. What is Christianity's cross but a sun's rays deigning to elongate to touch the Earth? Do they pray to the "Sun, Further and Holy Spirit"? or did I mishear?
And this relates to you being a weirdo how?
Basically it reminds that perspective is based always on where you are at the moment, obviously as the ego has diminished within myself, and the fruits of freely loving and magickal thinking have begun to show, I feel even more detached - not from reality (oh I wish) - but from normative state of appreciation and interest in usual things. I haven't been enjoying getting drunk for the last seven or so months, I'm bored of getting stoned, love it as I does, I fall into a deep hatred of any project I begin with best of intention and much will, my heart can resonate at any frequency it desires and yet it chooses to reflect and recieve and not act and give.
I am happy for my lonely detatchment. It can change in a second if I wish it and I do occasionally. I'm happy for this change away from normality hoping it will go so far round in a circle into a more beautiful version of normality. Happy for the sight of them, letting off that dark clouds of energy and wondering, where the hell it all goes and why would you cast off something so useful? Because it feels good? Feeling good isn't good enough anymore... I have a different perspective... I have peace. Just giving and receiving acts of reflection. It's horrible what we do to our own dreams by Sun and by Moon, what we do to ourselves, half killed to prove we were alive.
There was always this horrid feeling at the back of my head I should be doing something. It prompts anxiety, self-loathing and curious hatred towards everything. And apparently hate is just Fear an outward reaction to it or something.
I don't seem to fear the same things as most people now, they seem to fear death, hell, eternity yet I just fear life, heaven, and the second always past. Where they fear sadness i fear happiness, addiction substituted by a lack of desire, disapproval for approval.
The totality of the duality of it all pisses me off, yes there is always a reconciliation for the moment, but it is never permanant. All i have are collections of three words: It Will Pass, Nothing Really Matters, Only a Feeling, It's Not Serious, Things Will Change, I'm Different Now, Not Your Fault, All Your Fault.
A friend told me his girl was pregnant today. Maybe I know for any child coming into this strange fucked up world - G-d fucking bless you and good luck... and my friends you'll be heartbroken a thousand times over and that's just if your lucky...
Why anyone would seriously, rationally and compassionately think it's a good idea to bring another person into this crowded dying planet is beyond me but...
I was so happy for him, her, them... I pray it works out well and its good for them both... It seems I've reached some stage in life where everyone's long term coupled or bitterly alone and peeps are starting having baby-peeps. it's scary in a way. This is a different, very different generaation coming up, people say they are dumb, controlled, and 'feral'.
That can't be the whole truth, they are also bitterly intelligent, disciplined with letting go and cunning enough to use intuition and heart enugh to make a little change to the sickness of soul that pervades the daily character of life, but only a little change, no-one will probably notice.
And life is sick, right now, it definitely seems. I didn't want to judge the world, because as we judge we will be judged, but it isn't just me. it's everyone. We know things are not right, that lies are thicker in the fabric of our cultural overcoat than truth, and that shit rises where it should be flushed and it's imprints scrubbed.
It's become abundantly clear, in my short, miserable little life that the problems in the structure of society mirror the individual human natures the structure is powered by. Within families there is always a leader, male of female, within companies there is always a head salary, within nations there is always a dictator.
In our society we can't even know the names of our dictator. In a pseudo-democratic modernist wasteland. We are our own dictators - and like critics i suppose, there is no worse dictator than yourself. I wish I could dictate myself to get a good job, get less fancifully tied up in symbols and supposed hidden meanings, but I can't seem to let it go. I'd love to think of maybe three years and some luck down the line and I could have a family and be happy with someone, but if my bon idee was asking now, I'd say no. Go away... It's fucking strange.
Knowing you could have what you wanted tomorrow if you chose to and not caring to seize it because you're scared the ends are not as beautiful as the means is the crucifying nothingness that's always bothering somehow. Fundamentally all I want to do is just make one beautiful thing before I die so I can feel my parents time wasn't completely wasted, just one perfect thing and I'd be happy.
Just one thing, that ain't, a kid.
Yet, even if by achieving the impossible and single handedly whipping my reserve magic wand out and bringing a free ice cream and lithium utopia to all, i know that I'd be the first prck to be bitching and being miserable about something. Or trying to piss other people off, or just stay hermitise indoors, communing with my best beloved inner cunt.
I fucking hate myself. People are gay. Fuck this shit. It. Don't. Stop. :/ At least this day though having some honestly bless girlie friends who I'm sure understand that though a person can feel like they are crazy and that's always valid I wouldn't ever do anything crazy and it's not wrong in itself, only if it's wrong for you kinda thing :/
I dunno, somedays I feels like I'll embrace the eccentricity and that will help, and others feels like I can kill it if I just control a little more. Another dualism to reconcile I don't know, I don't care, it's all chasing the wind... making the wind, breaking the wind. I'm boring myself now finally. If this makes any kind of sense to me in the morning I will treat myself to two Apples.
using Wensleydale cheese :/ might throw it off a bit but looks good. Cooked pic coming next :)
Conclusion: Pizza dough recipe is incredibly good. Chunky tomato sauce is crap and pesto and litte pasta sauce works better. Also: Wensleydale cheese is crap for cooking with, however over all, balls to Pizza hut and other pizza shops - you are now surplus to my requirements... this is better bread...
...and if you gauge the yeast about 75% of most recipes you won't get the evil bread farts...
Do it right. No-one can make pancakes faster than the time taken to eat them. Therefore - to avoid grillside indigestion...
Make one - And put the subsequent productions inside it or outside it. Scientists would say outside is best due to Entropy of heat in an ever expanding universe, but, let us not get too deep and meaningful about it...
...It's a fucking pancake.
Suffice to say - three or four rolled up inside each other then carefully sliced into bitesized chunks - will see you for a warm meal and something of elegence. A pancake that doesn't look like it's just dropped out of Nora Batty's cuntflaps. See below.
"Great food is like great sex. The more you have the more you want."Gael Greene once rakishly quipped, although who Gael Greene is I don't know and I can't be bothered googling, however the point is well made.
Food. Food and Sex. Mmmmm Food. Mmmmm Sex. The Fast Food Rockers obviously knew a bit too much about the two - and so decided to share their expansive knowledge with the world through the medium of song - and for this: We must thank them.
"I think of you and lick my lips You've got the taste I can't resist Can't resist - can't resist Let's eat to the beat!"
It's not easy to write good lyrics that touch people deep inside, tenderously caressing their inner spirit, re-assuring them of beauty- truth- love and other nice stuff. Trust me I know. It's hard not to sound... not to sound...well... kinda Gay...
Gay being something you could never accuse this musical ensemble of sounding. They have an important point to make about our culture - and indeed - make it they do. How they do this and retain such childish fun and humour - is of course - their own hermetic deep artistic secret of genius, and far be it from me to try and analyse such.
You're so sweet and you're neat You knock me off my two feet You're chunky and hunky I'm coming back for more (Hot Dog)
See what I mean? Sheer brilliance that needs no more explication or reflection. It just is - but - having analysed the substance of this song, let us move to consider the deeper ramifications of style that this UK number one smash hit used to provoke the cultural apotheosis that is this melodic treatise on consumerism.
The protagonists, plastic wrapped performers, all engender the ideal of the "happy happy fast food service person". The rapidity and uniformity of location and props within the music video all bear the metaphor of the soulless continual cheery grind of bashing out burgers, handcrafting hot dogs, and proferring pizza as an occupation. It is honest. It is sarcastic. Yet it does not allow it's sarcasm to interfere with the fun. It is - analogous to any fast food franchise... happy happy - whilst dying inside and getting fat with the satanic greed of it all.
How can you not love this track?
As George Bernard Shaw himself said: “There is no sincerer love than the love of food.”
I care about homelessness a lot, let's not go into why right now (as if it needs justification) but, even were I to win the lottery and become a multi-millionaire overnight - I wouldn't give nothing to the big homelessness charities. Fuck em. Here's who I would Donate To.
Why not the big boys? Well - they'd probably just spend it on crack. The hypocrites.
Crack? Yes. CRACK.
Charity fundraising - well you got to spend money to make money right?
Raising awareness - cause seeing more and more beggers in your suburb ain't enough. We need us a billboard! That will help!
Administration. Or rather - maladministration. Massive central London offices with receptionists that would shit themselves if a tramp dared to walk within and ask "10p for a cuppa guv?".
Corporatisation of social issues and activism. Hey, if you ain't registered with NCVO, you can't get volunteers easy. If CLG don't recognise your service, you best beware the long arm of the law, because Charity is too big a business to leave in the hands of the people themselves. Init?
Kainotophobia - that's fear of change to you and I. They will swear blind of course that: "we wish we could negate the need for our own existence and end homelessness at a stroke." Yet they are either ignorant to their own nature as an organisation, or ignorant towards the nature of the problem. Either of which suggests - money is better spent - sorting out a bro some real crack than giving it to the big business charities to waste on theirs.
More on this issue of "a fear of change".
The homelessness industry: And believe me: It is an industry - often cites three main causes of homelessness in our modern egalitarian Willy Wonka fantasy society. These are:
* Drugs and Alcohol * Mental Health * Family Breakdown
"HANG ON!" - the sages among you will cry, "I don't hear nothing about bricks, mortar, and the benjamins!"
Quite right - and there's a good, good, good, reason for that. Fear of Change - especially since the insipid rise of something called: "The Third Sector". More on that evil later, but for now, let's refute the three main causes - which are - actually to anyone with a brain which hasn't yet been thoroughly washed - more better defined as symptoms, not causes.
* Drugs and Alcohol - when is last time you saw a homeless aristocrat pisshead? They're a bit of an abberation aren't they? Exception that proves the rule? Exactly. Drugs do NOT cause homelessness. Alcohol does NOT cause homelessness. What homelessness charities should be saying is that it is The Fallacious Drug War that helps to cause homelessness. The drugs themselves. Meh. Not responsible. Yet of course there is little money in being pro-liberty on the matter of drugs for a homelessness organisation. You don't get a grant unless you can help push the great "temperance" agenda it seems. Society is now set up more than ever through smoking bans long with most other law for the social ostracism of Drug users, abusers and addicts. Especially if they can't afford it because of the cat and mouse game prohibition causes. The fact is: People blame drugs where the fact is the drug laws making the problems of use, abuse, and addiction so much more magnified that you would have thought it would be a tautology to even mention. If Crack and Heroin were one hundred times cheaper less users be truly homeless. S'gotta be init? Or they'd be dead. It's all problem solved from the machiavellian perspective init?
* Mental Health - this is so stupid it beggars belief. Unfair Pun intended. Once again a symptom and not a cause. Mental Health breakdowns in care and general awfulness on the part of the public towards mental health exacerbate an existing problem. This society and it's bullshit rationales are so fucked anyway - "if you're not mad, you're not, paying enough attention" anyway.
* Family Breakdown - dit-fucking-to. Kids in care becoming homeless afterwards? Up to 20% do. Miles more than "Un-government-cared" for kids. Local authorities have improved in some areas like this, but the fact is the law has made it obligatory to see through to housing those it finds 'intentionally homeless'. In short, wouldn't the sector better be placed to putting sensible real world development of property for rented purchase at cost with profit share along with mentoring real world persons with local authorities in cases of prolonged difficulty? If they want a "third Sector"...fucking give em one!
Or is the government as corrupt as the big homelessness industry for just wanting... money... money... money... power... power... power? Homelessness is a choicewhen one is compis mentis to work the fact we are a human family and there is enough love to care for all. It's just horribly misdirected and shit on the vulnerable and the naive... I think perhaps this is what pisses me off most with this whole issue. In a pussified third sector platitude spitting C.R.A.C.K. addicted big homelessness industry... there's no chance of helping anyone until you've pushed them so low they haven't a chance anyway under the present system. If hidden homelessness is around 400,000 - 1 million and actual rooflessness a 500-3000 person phenomenon... it looks like despite the governments best satanic efforts... the family is if not ideal... still superior to single individuals alone under one government. Which is the goal after all. Trust me the elites will pursue us until we are all legally if not practically homeless. It's the natural need of any tyranny: to subjugate for the sake of subjugating.
Why the fuck can't they fix it for good and show it fixed? Are they thick? Does the suffering of a rolling percentage of people prop up the entire housing market or something? There but for the grace of the Lord etc?
IF you don't believe near enough the entire Homelessness Industry has a fear of change and sophistical outlook on the problem then ask yourself this: Why do so few mention the economy in any macroeconomic context whatsoever? Why don't they mention that our DEBT based monetary system is predicated on the Private sale, lease, and general rentier nature of land rights and distribution?
Is it cos we is too thick to get wot dey is sayin if dey did lay it out for us? I don't think so. Meet the real Causes of homelessness here:
Volumes have been written on this. Crack wouldn't probably exist but for cocaine's illegality. It's the least ethical product in the world, you don't say?. Drug addiction rates were no higher in victorian times when drugs were legal. Homelessness sometimes arises directly because of the persecution of Drugs and Alcohol users, abusers, and addicts and it's a vicious circle. It's a health issue not a legal issue until others are harmed. Why isn't Drugscope pushing that line? DrugScope has received £4002689 in funding from government departments. They didn't even know what Ibogaine was when I asked why it thinks therapeutic miraculous effects on addiction are not well researched enough. Quelle surprise.
Debt Based Feudal Economy.
Georgism and national monthly income dividends are the only hope not just to save the economy, get out of the consume pollute cycle and spend more time doing what we like... but also the only hopeful way to ensure man's long term survival on the planet. Won't happen though. You'd need one hell of a government for that agenda. Damn. America would invade. A brief flavour of a more georgist approach to the distribution of income, as opposed to a classic capitalist or socialist model is simply well explained elsewhere. In this system people are forbidden to house themselves largely unaided without massive impediment rental income possibility determines housebuilding rather than local need and indeed ability to pay. The whole system is simple barmy, and yet because it is the norm, it is accepted as tolerable and of course has it's staunch defendants. Shame they gave all that money to the banks though. They could have equally divided it between renters and mortgagees in trouble and helped the banks at the same time. Oh well. Opportunity missed. Another hundred billion down the shitter. It's not like anyone's paying. Except with our lives. Every single day. Homelessness and workplace injury accounts for 60-100 directly attributable deaths a year in the UK. 1700 hours a year worked by average citizen a year hopefully for food warmth and shelter is spurious compared to 7-800 for our cave-dwelling forebears. It just doesn't add up. We're doing something wrong and socialism isn't going to solve it.
Insanity as Sanity.
If someone chooses continually to sleep rough should they be sectioned? Question coming soon to a backroom meeting somewhere before the Olympics. Politics is insane, and everyone in it more or less a sociopath, but it gives em something to do. Bless em. Meanwhile psychos are continually released onto the streets whilst nice people with massive traumas and anxieties are left out of care and housing priorities because of a culture that favours buck passing and the belief that you actually can pay someone to care. You can't. Baby P learned that hard lesson. Amid a mad economy, a mad drug war and an increasingly preassured housing market aren't we all mad? Competing for what is already owned? If the economy and conventional life is found insane by the individual, to fight against it is sanity, but even more is what to replace it with. As a nation we worry about Gross National Product. Yet in making the Product, we forget the productivity, because officially there is no reason behind our production, other than production itself. Which is why a telos or meaning is needed beyond simple "happiness" - We need a theory of idleness... and we need it ingrained in our ideas... asap. Before anymore lives are wasted. From Kendle to Kabul.
Enforced Banality of Conventional Lifestyle.
Freedom's what we sell you. Not what you get, Media as The Zenith of Art put's you off breakfast makes you want to go outside. The fact that that which is very successful often isn't very good. Constant hatred of modern family life, promotion of single occupancy ideal, of the homebuying ideal. Never questioning the central hypothesis of "why the fuck should pay a rental charge when the building's paid for". Some people want to be outside. There's fuck all provision or tolerance for such people as could be and the attempt to nobilise or demonise the agenda to either remove or embrace them is what continually leave the homelessness sector in a mess as to what to do and leave the government and local authorities, caring a sight more about the disbursement and buck passing even in a monetised subsystem of supposed housing "choice based initiatives". The homeless and badly housed are taunted monthly with price is right 'here's what you would have won' choice based lettings allocated by criteria, so twistedly strange, so incomprehensibly applied, resulting in disenchantment and enhanced alcoholism. Being seen to be done, rather than actually doing, because right now, the illusion that business and government do not in hand co-opt charity to make motive of symptom easing rather than cause crushing needs to be reflected upon...
all To be covered in depth in our next "mad" ranty "disestablishmentarian" contrariwise blog posting very soon... and fear not, I won't just blame government the bad cop or charity the good cop, we'll blame society, the corner shop, each other, your mumma and ourselves as well. It'll be fun. You'll see... :/
Semantic Map of Homelessness Related Campaigns for London... from ShelterCrisis
It would be nice to cry. Yet tears are a release and there is no release from this. Not even death... you'd only come back here Jon... there's too much irony in the air for that not to be true.
I look at the paper. There's roughly three times as many prostitute advertisements as job advertisements. 30% of those jobs are MLM scams. 50% are part time. 20% need a driving license. 100% of them suck and kill the will to live.
What is the point? Is it a testament to how nice we are - how used - how used to the grindingly accepted abuse of government and each other that we aren't all rioting, revolting, DOING SOMETHING?
Another political party emerges, a facebook group rises, an election is fought. Conservatives win again. Maybe next year they cry! We shall never give up! We shall never give in!
Yeah. Never give in being fucking stupid.
I hereby give notice to quit. I am done hoping for better, dying inside that the corruption, the meaninglessness, the boredom and ennui towards a happier and more loving life is completely dead.
I want to kill. I want to end life. I want to steal and desecrate anything any G-d or spirit ever made. I want my family safe from the coming cull, I don't want to think those children who watched their mother die in front of them will have to grow up in this area like I did, an area where the greatest public entertainment is the burning down of a tree, the smashing of someone's face, and the legendary ac of inebriation...
"Remember that night we got so fucked we puked over each other and fell unconscious?"
"Errr... No I don't"
"EXACTLY! WICKED WUNNIT?"
This is our lives. It's fucking sad. This fucking area where the local councillors and busybodies in some temperance fuelled sickness campaign against a newsagents next to an off-license being allowed to sell beer...
WHAT FUCKING DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE?
Do they seriously think the drink is the problem? The problem is there is no easier way to forget yourself and your troubles. You can't go to a pub with your friends...
1. Everyone smokes so you have to get cold in beer garden. Fuck it. Stay in.
2. No-one can afford the drinks. Fuck it. Stay in.
3. The pubs are all shutting anyway cause toryLABOUR ARE SHIT SCARED OF THE WORKING MEN COMING TOGETHER AND TALKING HONESTLY. Fuck it. Stay in.
4. Most pubs are full of wankers giving it large to impress very stupid women so that they can spread the genes of idiocy to the next generation. Fuck it. Stay in.
5. You're trying to avoid drinking cause between the govt and the corporation - you're destitute anyway - existing upon pseudo-charity through the Local authority and the JSA. Also you're a borderline alcoholic and you find it hard to get pissed on anything that doesn't come in a tin over 7% ABV.
Whatever. Pbs wll still exist in the NWO - don't worry barflys. They'll just be chain bars. You will not be allowed doubles. There will be no Lock-ins, There will be no escape from the corporation, adverts on the bottom of every pint glass. Your ID card will be swiped with ever purchase and 'naughty points' totalled automatically to raise your tax premiums for the NHS...
...Yes. The NHS. That thing you love so much. The thing that killed my nan, will probably kill my parents, and hopefully will kill everyone else and leave the fucking swines that gripped their way up Satan's greasy penis to enjoy each others invideous hypocritical company for all eternity along with their BUPA membership...
... The membership we couldn't hope to afford because 20% of all tax imposed without choice went towards the NHS. Fuck the NHS. Univeral healthcare is good shit. Government managed healthcare is a TOTALITARIAN NIGHTMARE.
But what do I know? I'm just a nutter whose mother's mother - a woman who lost her husband in the war during pregnancy, DIED IN SHIT PISS AND FILTH BECASUE OF FORIEGN AGENCY NURSES WHO
1. Couldn't talk enough English to order crisps and lager in a pub.
2. Couldn't give a shit about the people in their care because "Dey ain't od mah tribe".
3. Couldn't care less because as long as you don' rock the fucking boat and work for better in public "service" YOUR JOB IS SAFE.
FUCK THE NHS. FUCK EVERY MUPPET WHO WENT ALONG WITH THE BULLSHIT MANIPULATED CYNICAL XENOPHOBIC TRANSATLANTIC "NER NER NER NER NER" that was the "Twitter We Love the NHS Supposedly Spontaneous uprising of support."
FUCK YOU.
THREE SIMPLE STEPS
1. BAN POLITICAL PARTIES
2. REPEAL ALL POST-WW1 LEGISLATION
3. END DEBT BASED MONEY AND RENTIER ECONOMY
ONE SIMPLER STEP
1. STOP FEELING YOU ARE WRONG FOR FEELING ANGRY. STOP FEARING SADNESS, STOP DROWNING AND RUNNING AWAY FROM MISERY, REPRESSED ANGER *IS* MISERY. KNOW YOUR ENEMY AND LET T OUT. DESTROY THEM BEFORE THEY DESTROY US!!! WE ARE RUNNING OUT OF TIME AND WHAT ARE WE DOING?
WE'RE MOANING ON THE INTERNET!!!
(you knew I was going to end this on an ironic note didn't you? Am I that predictable? Fuck's sake....)
It's time capitalists, free-marketers, and lovers of liberal democracy stood up for the message of the socialists - NO WAR BUT THE CLASS WAR. The HIGH must be smacked back into place, The LOW must WAKE THE FUCK UP, and the MIDDLE must stop being EVIL pandering to the worst to achieve their relative precarious comfort.
1. It's not how left wing or right wing you are. Fighting between meaningless labels must end for there to be any hope of advancement in dialogue. How Libertarian vs. Authoritarian a person's politics are along with the execution of those policies is what matters - and politics is everywhere unrelated to government of society as it's normally restricted. Ends and Means... both matter - for the left authoritarians will go to any unjust means to achieve socially just ends, whilst the right authoritarians will go to any just means to achieve unjust ends - and call that equality.
2. Money is not the root of all evil. The love of money is the root of all evil. There's nothing wrong with having nice things - there might be something wrong with the way they were gained. Just because it's rich and powerful doesn't make it evil - it takes a hell of a lot to follow the money how and why it got there in whoever's pocket. For example David Cameron's isn't a cunt because he's a toff with a 60,000 a year job, directorships, heir to a fortune and unwanted by 90% of the country but soon to be PM anyway. He's a cunt cause he has all that and effectively claims more housing benefit then most families charging you for his mortgage. A hypocrit sucking at the common wealth whilst championing self sufficiency in a system he can never fix for the way it robs people of the chance of dignity.
3. There is always a motive behind anyone's actions. Crisis do not arise by accident outside the natural world. Whether the subject knows what the motive is or not is immaterial and unhelpful. For example - what is more racist - stopping millions of English youth from providing for and thinking for themselves or being against open immigration? Which tact operates solely upon one race? Yeah Fuck the BNP, but also, Fuck politically correct immigration that alienates our own people from our own lands. The motive behind demonisation of the far right - is a simple tack to demonise anti-immigration movements by proxy -
I was just returning home from the pub. Everything was normal. I walked past the dustbins on the edge of our block of flats. As I passed the bins something made me stop listen and take stock.
"oh wowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww" came a long imploring siren's song from behind the bins.
Not one to be so easily goaded I decided this was either jestery on the part of some local pesky kids, or there actually was someone dying behind the bins, either in sexual wonderment or the lack of drugs. Either way - I wasn't going no-where near those fucking bins to check which. Let 'em 'ave 'em I thought.
I've been caught out before like that. Anyway...
"oh wowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww miiiiserrry" came again that low growly sound.
"Fuck this" I thought and grabbed my keys tightly - ready to stab them square in the face of anyone who surprised me as a result of my stupid curiosity - as ever getting the better of me.
I approached the Dustbins. Looking back now I wished I hadn't - but you can't change the past - only learn from it - and as all the sages say - all that is learned is that we never learn.
Philosophy aside I wasn't ready for what came next. One or two steps away from the smelly centre of filth and suddenly the dustbin lid burst asunder and none other than Amy Winehouse popped out singing "Crazy" by Patsy Cline. Wow. Why does it always happen to me?
Being shocked and not believing my eyes I jumped straight into self defence mode as my dexterity and lethal instincts got the better of me and POW POW POW - Amy got a Yale Key in both eyes sockets and her frontal lobe. Suitably chastised she slumped back into the three weeks worth of cat and fox shit that gave our communal dustbins, just that shade extra, of communal smelly goodness...
"Oh my Gawd I haven't had foreplay like that since Blake got banged up!" she warbled - blood running out of her eye sockets.
"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING IN MY BIN AMY WINEHOUSE?" I yelled at her - hence the dialogues reliance on CAPSLOCK...
"Your bin?" she said - slurring between lighting her final hit of crack and suffocating on the blood running from her eyes - "I thought this was Wembley Arena."
"DO YOU WANT AN AMBULANCE?" I again shouted.
"Eh? What for?" She said - and then added: "Can you lend me a fag thou? Mine are covered in blood and shit..."
"No problem Miss Winehouse" I said, lighting her a cigarette and passing it to her, quite nonchalantly considering I had just stabbed three holes in her head.
"Cheers luv" She said - gratefully - and without any of that sense of entitlement that we naturally expect of the rich and famous.
"So, erm, I'm going to bed - I'll just close the lid here and let you relax Amy, I can call you Amy right?" I asked: stupidly.
"Call me what you like luv" She said, adding, "I'll be dead by morning."
"Oh well then." I said. "Watch out for broken glass - and just have to say I loved your album!"
She didn't reply, she wasn't dead yet, simply dribbling and fingering her own eye sockets and giggling away to herself whilst also burning herself with the cigarette I gave her. Oh well I thought to myself as I gently laid back the lid of the dustbin...
In the morning, after a fitful night of restlessness, I decided not to check the dustbin and that it had all just been a bad dream.
Also - I thought having sex with a dead celebrity crackhead's body more than once would be a bit wrong of me.
The genius just kicks in so early with an alliterative but endlessly deep vocal sample of "Muna-mah-muna-mee" ancient druidic incantation that begins the track shifting seamlessly and with demonic cohesion tot eh main siren's song refrain of the Epic work of Whigfield - to wit: "Lah de de de, oh La de de oh lah de dah".
By capturing the end "Lah de dah" reference of most English speakers, Whigfield capitalises on the ostentation that often accompanies a series of Saterday night shenanegans "pursued by the kids" and reminds us in her own gentle way - to keep it simple, stupid... and gravitate towards the sheer funk in any given situation - rather than the appearence of it alone...
However long before that series of sonic sweetnesses carouse our ears we are enchanted and brought to the mood by the uncommon and calmingly uplifting "Duck Quack" background beat of the piece, perhaps possessed of the power to take our subconciousness back to a sunny day Saturday in the Park surrounded by ducks and just enjoying life unmolested by fears of bad hair, body odour, or simple insanity.
The beat behind the entire piece is a kind of 10% down tempo two step drum and bass number - revolutionary and forward thinking for it's time the fairy stepping Boom tish boom tishtish sound tickles a spirit both at the base whilst kissing it's forehead paternally and saying: "Let's get down and wiggle." And wiggle we most certainly do.
For who could not? When wWhigfield mashes it up and shows up her talent for ad-libbing masterfully morphing the lines"Lah de de de, oh La de de oh lah de dah" into "Bah de de de, oh bah de de oh lah de dah" who with working feet could resist the lure? not even Stephen Hawking could resist bopping to this. No sir.
By the time the main chorus of "Saturday night" rolls through the orchestration - we are sold, signed, sealed and delivered. Without hyperbole or any party political bias - all are dancing. Fundamentally Whigfield the musical alchemist takes the aim of ABBA's "Dancing Queen" and fulfills it's natural telos, ensuring that "Saturday night" will be played forever more across weddings and other discoy type intentioned ceremonial cultural rituals where a cross section of age and musical tastes would otherwise divide people - Whigfield brings them together.
Several people in my life who I care about are going through those moody ethereal "relationship" troubles lately. It sucks cause that's an area of advice or comfort I can't go into - and I've been feeling more and more for myself over this part year past that it's not going to play part in my future or destiny - to have anyone or to wish to have anyone to be tied through bonds of family subsequently broken... just ain't going to happen... awwwwww :D
Even though I know it is going to happen! :( There is a time between waking and sleeping. Something happens. I won't say what or that time is meaningless although it is and everything is planned out although it is - there is as much fate as we are willed to have but destiny is total and through the narrative of the past can be seen the possibilities of the future. So I know I will die at 58 with two children, what they're like and how they came about, I haven't the foggiest - who she is - perhaps like with the glimpsing of auras I don't wish to know too much... if you have the aura related glimpse of someone's motivation at a point in time it seems to take the feeling out of relating to anyone. For me at least - there wasn't much feeling to start with - so best preserve what remains...
I used to live in the future. All during childhood and school college, uni. Up and till she died and my family went topsy turvy for a while. Then I lived in the present. Now I live in the past, but only enough to counteract the malcontentness of feeling like present life "isn't enough". I'll hold my silly dreams now and know they are silly and not really my own. Back then i thought sincerely a life of lawyerly letters and argument was going to ring my bell, make the parents proud, and ensure a comfortable life like I had always had and hence become accustomed and dismissive to.
And back to Relationships proper - people like to say they are the only thing that really matters - the only thing that makes life tolerable.
The G-d Awful truth is - They're right I think. The bastards...
No Money can get you the warmth of a simple accepting hug after years of lonely toxicity, No Gold will ensure the shelter of someone's hands to hold or voice to hear as you wait to die, No power will make people love you, or let you love them.
And that's what pisses me off about relationships - because as with this purely 'emotional/psycoholgical' estranged moodiness so many couples get into and the never get out of - it's the same with friends and family. We may see it as just a physical day to day practical What do I get?" - "Do I have something to come home to?" - "Am I worth a fuck?"...
but As above so below, and to the base all things base, and to the pure all things pure...
The physical is the spiritual and the spiritual the physical. Within every stinking bearded ugly old diseased corpse of living flesh there is a soul, a spirit, a something - some spark of brilliance in animation - life.
And this is the problem. You can act it out all you like and have the best superficial world around you so as to be the envy of every lifestyle page reader commuting home after being burned-out for some faceless shareholders... but it's almost like the riddle of the pretty girl... "has anyone ever really liked me - for me?"
The estranged, moody, ethereal - "can't exactly put your finger on it" issues are all I am certain just soemthing to do with failing to communicate and co-operate towards the best mtual facilitation of needs and boundaries. It's a spiritual manifestation of an obvious physical reality staring you in the face. Not a signal of destiny or another false path hoped to blossom but never out of bud... a simple reaction to the truth of the day here and now.
That's a bit cold and clinical isn't it? Maybe we could talk in terms of humours, feelings, emotive thoughts and childhood dreams - but we'd just be kidding ourselves - I look around at the friends I have those people I've chosen to have in my life and I see most of them have just fallen into one relationship after another... feigning weary disinterest in it all and then next week shacked up with a bird they met on the bus straight after. And oh Best beloves - how you ever going to get what you need if you don't know what you need? How are your boundaries not going to be pushed open if you don't know where or why they are where they are?
Some will say we all just want the same things - security, acceptance, passion, friendship, trust, fidelity... They say that needs from relationships are universal and calculable. They say that boundaries are negotiable based on the people involved. I don't agree. it's all negotiable. Quite a few such "relationship-commentator" type people are divorced - but meh - failure is the best earning experience perhaps.
That's what pisses me off. The largest proportion of this world just wants to give love. Much as it grits my teeth to say - my parents were right in saying 90-99% of the world is good - you just really notice the 1-10% of arseholes, wankers and cunts out there...
And everyone wants to be loved. Especially those that pretend not to - those who'd say that it is beneath them, or that, they do not believe in it as a concept beyond chemicals alone. And yet - no-one but no-one can ever reallly get it together on a long term basis.
All passion turns into Matzo's and TV in bed and thinking of others whilst fucking.
All love turns into duty and pretence - artifice and hallmark moments.
Love is addictive. Love is a drug. Love is the confluence of every other emotion rolled into one. Rage in desire, mirth in hatreds, fear in joy. We're alll still children inside - greedy and selfish - no religion or boot camp can cure it - only consciousness and comprehensive love mitigate the fact - like sweets, like the crack, like that one pint too many - just can't get enough.
So instead of checking ourselves and asking if we are at fault we blame the concept itself. Because we can't control our impulses, we ask for laws and processes to change our behaviour, to be our Gods.
And such is marriage. A beautiful religious concept of deep spiritual meaning. Corrupted by law and process, calculated by tax and incentives, statistically measured by the ONS. Expected of every proper boy and girl out there in order to be "a classic success" within the social world.
Love is a paradise. A paradise that can make poverty, insanity, illness - not just tolerable or easier, but magickally above just normalcy being not so - but like all paradises - and everything else in this world of man - it's not just the fact you've got it...
It's how much you've got in relation to everyone else. And i'm sure in the subconcious of individuals and the magus mundo of humanity as a whole - that does some very horrible things with the concept of love and being in love at the base of consciousness that helps fuck it all up...
The same evil way the advertising industry can frame your perspective without even being aware of it - the dumbing down and depression and ennui surrounding love in a sexual or emotional or platonic or universal sense has got to contribute to the supposed natural entropy and emotional distance that plagues so many relationships.
Cause we're all so scared to get hurt - and then if and when we get over that mindfuck molehill...
We become so afraid to hurt anyone else - and so the result - is a world where no relationship can ever be perfect because perfect is now a simple marketing device a cookie cutter for a sick domesticity in which Daddy never gets sex, Mummy dreams of having the poolboy, and everyone's car is really shiny and the virginia creeper running up the side of the house is simply darhling!
Fuck that.
I have few needs. I just want someone I can love without it being thrown in my face/used against me and with someone who is a person I could like as a friend. That last snippet is is the result of much bitter experience - oh how you can love someone you don't even like! I'd be happy enough with the need to be needed vs the want to be wanted in reciprication. Simple. The usual. Yet let's compare that to the list of demands modern society says needs needs needs must in a relationship:
"make you feel good about yourself"
- erm yes and no - what if you actually are being a cunt? Do I need someone to bullshit me? "always be on your side"
- what even if I'm going on a jew killing rampage through North London? "always be there for me when I need"
- what are you? A fucking child? How about an "if he/she can?" Proviso? "be romantic"
- so many different versions of that. All of the wrong... but only when you do them. ;) "fidelity/monogamy/faithful"
- why don't you just stick a bullring in their genitals bit of fishing wire and have done with it? - - Look, if someone's gonna cheat, someone's gonna cheat. most faithful guy on the planet will fuck a skank if you've sex depreived him enough, as will most women if their beau is withholding the cock. Fuck all this stupid possessive shit. See here: http://www.messagefrommasters.com/Shiva-Shakti/Differences_Between_men_&_women.htm "someone I can get along with"
- DURRRRRRRRRR, so simples, now that you say it! :) "honesty and integrity"
- I heard tell of a cute lad who once told everyone straight-out when asked what he did that he was a master criminal. It was honest - there was integrity - but there was a criminal. Nice sentiment though. "intelligence"
- really? honestly? bollocks. "and so it goes..."
- it's limitless - our desires for what we wish other people could do for us - how much we can montize and commodify whatever love we have in our lives. Awful aren't we? All the above is the obvious diverting self-help introspective waffle you've come to probably detest. In simplicity in relationships we just need love. Soppy, but true, doesn't have to involve your genetalia. It's a universal concept of living. It's the ultimate tool of Witchcraft.
I have lots of boundaries. I'm not proud of the fact and not ashamed either but then I do have a very loose grip on sanity, and I erected this little fence to help me, help myself, to help others. And it works. So don't take the piss out of my fencing. Please. Thanks... Conventional 'wisdom' on boundaries says there shouldn't be any. I disagree. With style...
Boundaries need to be there with family, friends, lovers - pretty much the same. Jon's number one rule is simple and beautifully worded: to wit: "if you feel like you're being taken for a cunt, you probably are, you cunt." See? I'm a fucking poet apparently...
I won't go into my boundaries here - not though there are so many, or it's too personal... simply I can't be bothered right now. Enough to say that people like myself who have always been down on theirselves, having big self-esteem issues, and general neurotisism - generally tend to get dumped on and used more in relationships as a focal point of that "people pleasing" tendancy - or the old "Second best is all I deserve", or the classico: "I'm just lucky to have anyone" mentality.
Whilst low self esteem means more propensity find it hard to get into a good relationship and when in a relationship to be a doormat, those with too high self esteem have the opposite problem naturally - more chance to have a series of essentially meaningless relationships and the likelyhood of abusing their partner emotionally. No-one wins. Ever. And this is the sort of fact that cheers me up. Sick fuck that I am.
I'd rather have low self esteem that too high self esteem anyway regardless. Shame seem to veer wildly between the two, but what-ev-er...
We're just children. We tend to hear about "Enlightenment is to have the heart and soul of a little child" - but that's cockwaffle without the corollorary of a mind at peace and in love with it's own consciousness.
That's the largest aim of writing this fucking blog anyway Best Beloved - just trying to get myself - to stop hating my own consciousness here - hope you don't mind!
We all need to get in touch with out outer Adults and wise up. Love isn't the problem. We are. It doesn't suck. We suck. We don't deserve it. We are it. However do we get better?
Know thyself, remember yourself, love everyone - but don't get mugged off. Know your boundaries - know what you need - be reasonable in how much of them are humanly possible to fufill... realise it isn't chocolate boxes and roses, it isn't a hot fuck down an alley in broad daylight, and it isn't always perfect and it isn't always 'nice'.
Friction produces growth. Life abhors a vacumn. Between all your boring little emotional troubles and mine there's only one truth. We're growing and getting better even though it feels like we're falling apart. We are not our feelings but they are all we really have. Relationships are important. Let them be as commercially desirable, locationally convenient, socially acceptable as you want. Without love - their not even relationships. They're just networking.
We are not ranked by amount or quality of the people in our lives although often in this crazy reality it can seem so - Oh to be born a prince, Oh not to be a social leper, etc - but I believe we are emancipated in some way by the amount and quality of our love for the people in our lives. For most nearly everyone would agree at that, in public if not personal action, for too often we seek to be loved more than to give it. I see it as a beautiful mark of wisdom in those that just want to provide it without any hint of payback and we can find that all around - The farmer beloved of the land that allows us bread, and the Nurse beloved of humanity that allows us to heal etc etc.
For those friends fretting on their finely tuned feelings I am sorry - no-one can help you - the other party won't change instantly at the utterance of some magickal refrain. Just please remember you're lucky to have someone who let's you try to adore them, and if it doesn't go right, big whoop. It's not time wasted - it's time well spent. If there were never any other people in the world how would we know who we are and how we stand and measure up against the others - the standard model - the orthodoxy of it all?
I never regret all the shit I went through with my soon to be ex-wife. I learned so much - and above all - I'll always have the memory of love felt like and no matter what the future brings there will always be a silver cord there of now detached, but still, shameless care and adoration.
Through her and the pains she put me through, or more correctly, the pains I let myself be put through I found myself capable of achieving things I didn't think I could, being more patient and liking that about myself, and knowing more of what love is and what it is also not. Such that now, despite not being in any relationship casual or otherwise now, I can say I will always be in love - I will always feel love, and I will always do my best to offer as much as I can to anyone I can to whatever capacity I can without harming myself. I don't hate myself now and I don't hate people. I just don't like em much.
I know Love will never be perfect. That makes it perfect. It can grow. There is always time and This time - This time - This time... It's fine just as it is....
I thank you for the father - guidence so gentle and straightforward. I thank you for the mother - nurture so cold and convoluted. I thank you for the sky above - whatever it chooses to do. I thank you for the earth below - the dirt is beautiful.
For the Moon I glance revering - never too long. Eternal friend two faced yet showing one alone. For the Sun I neglect ignorant - always too long. Eternal enemy yet burning hate bringing such goods.
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
I adore you for the ignorance. The inability to change anything. I adore you for the consciousness. The ability to change everything. I adore you for the water. It never stops the softness of intent aiming low. I adore you for the fires. It never stops the hardness of discontent aiming high.
Nothing has to be reconciled. Just a puppet between two strings. One is going to snap. Not our choice. Chance for easy explanation ringing true.
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
Let the idiots enjoy their copyright. Let the stars enjoy their pride. Let the greedy grasp power. Let the dead walk again.
I might seem ungrateful. It's just an act. I did forget the price. Yet I'll remember the value.
Because One Anti smoking campaign per European Nation just isn't good enough... Europe has started a Europe wide campaign organised by country - to help you stop not feeling guilty for doing what you want.
Refused to comment when questioned on the phone if they were going to be replaced by the new European propaganda service stating: "We would obviously welcome any assistance in the efforts of helping public health in the UK but are not aware of any plans to close or alter the service in response to this new Europe wide initiative."
When asked for a name to attribute the quote - the phone was put down hastily. I should have explained no-one reads this blog and I was just playing journalist whilst bored but - hey ho and lol...
Posits the clever theory that smoking is so hated because as a psychotropic drug - nicotine - actually produces "free-thinking". Which is interesting. Puff Puff Puff
Posits the simply ingenious theory that Pharmaceutical companies simply envied the business model of Big Tobacco and needed a way to "get summa dat action".
Whatever the Truth behind it all - here sure is a lot of hot air and smoke going into making people guilty, cold and ostracised outside, but at the least as BanTheMindReader pointed out - We can now enjoy the Body Odours of our fellow citizens in Public venues as opposed to the Damn awful smell of Tobacco.
How can too much gentleness and kindness be frightening? Too much conscience - too much care - too much love?
Because all such things are evil?
- The gentleness that coddles delusions dear
- The kindness that pulls in and tastes only to later reject
- The conscience that pre-empts and pisses upon all the minutest actions
- The care that allows the control - the sense that makes the Carrot desirable
The Love that kills the heart, confuses the mind, and breaks it all down - to get a little closer to the spirit behind everything. That rare love you don't really need anyone else in your life for - but that you have to change your life for and be prepared for it to snowball at any moment.
Yet what is found but sophistry and more desires for elegance, meaning, beauty albeit on a higher level? In the Buddhist vogue - if you had a soul - would you want it?
Oh and we left the sociopathic machinations of the normal people's world so long ago now. Didn't we?
- For a qualification, the approval of an institution, £30,000 and three years of life. Wasted.
- For a job, the employ of an institution, £30,000 plus and more life wasted. Less income.
- For a person to trust and just adore, £20,000 and so much wasted, false consternations.
- For a passion that does not fade, they tried for money from I and I from them, all time wasted.
- For a cause that is not corrupt, or compromised, trying to find or start. So much wasted. Naive.
So we are left with a shell. A shell so hard and yet so unthreateningly passive that the assumption is goodness and virtue must lay inside. The guesstimation that something has got to be in there. It just can't be more angst, uncertainty and moody humours.
I can't help myself out of this stinky pit - existential nightmare - where the fact of recognising everything as both true and not true is not a comfort but the ultimate Nietzsche Abyss - as the anonimongs say - what has been seen, cannot be, unseen.
- I woke up - I put flouridated water in a kettle. I didn't want or ask for it flouridated. Whatever.
- I haven't paid the bill since I came here. I'm scared of it. I'm financially incompetent in the extreme. Fundamentally I haven't the money and if I did, I'd spend it on something useful, like Drugs - not a water system that's already been payed for and subsidised many times over, then farmed off as an income producing asset for a quick buck on the Major Government's part.
- I push the laptop on. I don't even read the news anymore. It's sickening and I know what they've written before even reading it. Email - quick chat with mate - nothing new - nothing good.
- Play guitar for a couple of hours. Become immensely frustrated. Eat the cold Fusilli Arribatia from yesterday to stop the stomache ache. More coffee.
- I haven't slept in two days. Fully expected. Not even a sliver of weed to assist so fuck it. Upwards and onwards as the old parents used to say.
- Electric company call. Just checking accounts before they smack some £70 late payment bullshit on. I tell em to run that bill up as much as they like and send me to court. I ain't dealing with a company that takes five months to respond to a letter and advances the notion that a single guy in a flat can use more electric than a five piece family in a detached house. Likewise one that can't be bothered to spell my name right - especially after being told three fucking times. By Phone, By Phone, By Letter. Cut me the fuck off. I'll just lay here. I can't be bothered.
- The one who suffers my besottedness, I think of her and wonder but refuse to drift into any pleasant sideline of wistful fantasy. Can there be one thing you do not poison? Probably not. Did feel totally lifted though - for that moment - before it crash landed for the lack of meaning or possibility. Maybe worse of all desirability - for the inevitability - the idea is always better than the reality.
- Everything got cleaned, everything got moved, chaos re-arranged. The illusion of control, of order, or stability. I want to burn this place to the ground with me inside it. Throw the cat out the window and say 'sorry bud - but you should have known - you can't trust anyone. Good luck.'
- I thought about looking for work. Something to feel worthwhile, a diversion of progress, if only could break that £300 a week ceiling it would be attainable. Debts would slowly get paid, weekends would not be a febrile attempt to interface with similar entities such as myself but with the false fronts of public enjoyment amid the rapture of the Weatherspoon, all really for a sniff and a smoke- a tingling levity of spirit cast in simplicity. No worries at the unseen. An animal- fuck that thing everyone else has been up? Why bother? Chips, Chicken, More drink, four successive wanks and a nice long fucking coma. That'll do me. Nope - no travel outside my alloted Zones thanks, No culture, no pretensions of productivity or creation. We'll sit in the bar and listen to trollops caw whose got the biggest cock and who it's being stuck in along with handbags tressels and phat choons. Meanwhile the lads bellow the finely tuned salutations towards the girls attractiveness and where exactly one's bodily fluids would land in order of preference - and also which cunt got smacked the fuck out in one mighty punch as a witty repost to some philosophical sarcasm or percieved slight or other. No. I'm sure the prick didn't stand a chance geezer. And Yes. He definitely had it coming. Verily Monsieur. My £1.29 pint of gutrot is nearly finished now. See you soon! This is my life. Even the supposed best bits - I make awful.
- I thought again hateful at the laviciousness within that can't seemingly either be denied or fufilled. The cryptic melancholy of knowing what you want, but not knowing what you need, and finding the process of caring or determining such to be too self-immoliating to stress about. So cold to wish you could be fooled again, wanting to be, but knowing you won't - and your guard is fully up ratcheted - of course you can let it down - but never as totally as the first time.
- Sit here, you could finish that comedy script. Only 2000 to go, it's different, even you Mr Critic think it's kinda entertaining Or could do more work on the homelessness site, ever more info, ever more arrangement... wondering how many more thousand hours it will take before someone can see the interminable slavery of property owning people, rather than people owning property - or not as the case may be. Displaying that regardless of every outward or inward determinant of a person - they're all part of the big game - pieces on a board. Everyone's happy until they feel the burn of it physically. Then they go madder. Then the worst part often comes. Not caring about anything. Sit here hour after hour for drug money, the promise of cans and comfortable comas, or worst of all just sit there for nothing staring into space and smiling blankly when someone comes to fufill the needs no longer even cared for by the person themselves. I'm not bothered cause I care about these people - I fucking hate them as equally as the pinstripe bastards who benefit from our conjoined subjugation - I just hate the lies surrounding it all. That this is right, natural, desirable, inevitable, plausible...
- When I was young, I shocked my parents deeply once, someone came over - asked the little boy: "what do you want to grow up to be Little Johnny?" - and Little Johnny said "Honest and kind". Little Johnny wasn't a complete perversity back then, he'd just read that in some newspaper column at 13 and thought it was quirky, kinda cool and a different response. Cue shared strange looks - and the riposte: "ah but everyone is honest and kind when they grow up!"
HaHa. Funny. Not everyone - I am kind to myself in any capacity that will kill me, kind to others in any way to get them to leave me alone, so kind - yes it is frightening... consideration above the norm is no consideration at all. It's irritation. Get what you want and fuck off. If you can work it out. I'm not even sure what kindness is anymore or the balance it requires to avoid being a doormat. I like to see people I know even if I hate them sincerely I still like to see them happy. I'd give them my last spliff or let em utterly fuck some space I care about as long as it raises their happiness a smidge - no matter if it sends me to depressed wackoland cause quite frankly: meh - not like ain't been there before and come up smiling. If albeit: perversely.
Honestly I didn't want to write this cause it's so nebulous, unclear in intent, and soporific as a session of venting. There's no way my head or body feels like it once did, and yet it's never bothered me so much, and I don't want to care. If I cared - it would make it worse - am sure the utter detatchment from self-identification I've always had would see such care manifest into something quite hideously beyond the somewhat silent sadness of just barfing it all into this blog. If it was just some neurotic disposition I could leave it, laugh at it and forget it, but being honest how can you remember thyself if you can't lose thyself?
PLease stop supporting shit parties that only want to rob you and sell you out. Vote Third Party. Not the Lib-Lab-Con. If you are holding your nose whilst voting YOUR DOING IT WRONG!
Never Mind The Rest, We Need Some Peruvians!
-
Phil "Custard Face" Woolas, the useless glove-puppet notionally in charge of
our borders should immediately issue instructions that Peruvians wanting to
c...
Enervated*
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After a week that has included some lovely highs and some even more terrible
lows, I feel a little drained. Usually when I say I'm going to take some
time ...
the silent is
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Electric cars should be fitted with a small Swiss cowbell to warn
pedestrians they are approaching because of their quiet engines, it has been
suggested....
Coloring Outside the Lines
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Our Flemish correspondent VH has translated an interview with Vlaams Belang
leader Filip Dewinter from the Dutch opinion weekly *HP/de Tijd*. It was
publis...
Ummuna's comments
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I'm sure you've read about some Orpington councillor's "racist rant". Well,
the blog Left Foot Forward has what Labour's candidate for Streatham, Chuka
Umu...
Justice-what Justice?
-
Above the Old Bailey stands the symbol of Great British Justice, the scales
of justice. Scales held by Lady Justice symbolizing the measure of a case's
s...
SUBMISSION GUIDELINES
-
CONTEMPORARY HORIZON MAGAZINE has published, and continues to seek quality
literary and non-literary texts by some of the finest writers, whether they
are...
Human Rights Group AGM
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The first Annual General Meeting of the Jersey Human Rights Group will be
held on Monday 23rd November at 5.30. The meeting will take place in the
States M...
Guilty Pleasures
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Apologies for the lack of posts recently - I have had a virus all week. This
has led to much sitting around and doing nothing, since when I tried to do
som...
Smokefree People
-
At the Telegraph, Ed West has been discussing highly-paid public sector
non-jobs. He's particularly bothered by this one ... over £50k for a local
authori...
Mandelson Grabs Nominet and Control of ISP's
-
The unelected one has grabbed himself some more power
"Officials said they believed it is unlikely the powers will be used"
...and said they were safely ...
-
Frickin' awesome:
Drinking alcohol every day cuts the risk of heart disease in men by more
than a third, a major study suggests.
And:
For those drinking ...
Climate Change Coverup News (update)
-
The actual emails referred to here are no longer on the FTP site. Climate
Audit and Watts Up With That are having problems with the amount of traffic
comin...
Deceiving the British People
-
* By Mister Fox*
We are taught that we live in democracy, but in reality our lives are run by
a power hierarchy where policies percolate downwards throug...
#paulclarke - important updates
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Last weekend there was a twitter storm over Paul Clarke, who found a gun, took it to his local police station and was arrested and now faces five years in pr...
Col. Lewis L Millett
-
Hill 180 - a painting by the Colonel.
An extraordinary man. Not often the Tuscan laughs in amazement on reading an
obit, but he did with this one.
RIP, ...
EU President & Foreign Minister
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No, not him, Tony Blair didn't get the job. Nope, some bloke from Belgium
called Herman van Rompuy got the job, the Belgian Prime Minister. Yep, I'm
sure y...
Global Warming and AGW SCAM has been destroyed
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Simple really. No more pissing about. Courtesy of JD's comment in an earlier
article.
You've seen Lord Monckton's recent talk?
http://www.youtube.com/watch...
Ed Balls up education
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I was delighted to read yesterday that Prince Charles has stopped talking to
plants in order to tell that fool Ed Balls that it's a really, *really*bloody s...
Giving up is easy
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Old joke: giving up smoking is easy, I’ve done it hundreds of times The
observant of you will have noticed that I have gone for several posts
without menti...
Most Definitely Not Canon
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Sorry, you can’t come in.
The figure barring my way is tall and broad. His all-white tuxedo is
impressive. As I stand there dumbly, he glances down at me.
...
Reply to CLG "We're so awesome" letter
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Dear Ms. Vaughan and the Rt Hon John Healey MP
I thank you for your letter of 17th November 2009 Reference JH/58/028204/09
but regret to say it was about a...
The Emma Harrison Story
-
The business world likes big, colourful personalities like Sir Richard
Branson, Sir Alan Sugar and Sir James Dyson. Some entrepreneurs achieve huge
status ...
Guardian Poll - Should the blogosphere be regulated?
-
"Baroness Buscombe, chair of the Press Complaints Commission, is reported to be considering extending the PCC's remit to the regulation of bloggers, as they ...
The most selfish Man in Britain? Gordon Brown
-
Is Gordon Brown the most Selfish person in Britain? While he chalks up extra
time in No.10 the rest of the country falls apart and the jobless remain
job...
Blood and Culture
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Here is a round up of the last few weeks,
*****************************************************************************
24th October Little Eris played at ...
Conservative Councillor - Fraud
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Former £127,000-a-year deputy mayor Ian Clement takes a break from painting
a lavatory block wearing a “community payback” jacket.
The Standard's exclusiv...
Who Might Run Industrial Policy?
-
It has been a while since I have last written a post, and the choice of
subject matter for this post has proven to be a difficult decision. On the
one hand...
-
All I have to do is wait a while... It is so great we do not own property
and there is nothing to settle. We really do not need to talk to each other
or se...
Your Name's Not Down - You're Not Coming In
-
Last week, I emailed my Letting Agents stating firmly but politely that they
mustn’t come round if I was out. They had (if you recall) left a hand
delivere...
ASDA IN HALAL STORM
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I saved this one for last, because, it truely sickens me.
We don't want to be forced to eat meat that goes against our beliefs, I
don't want to eat the meat...
Revealing Lisbon - Part 1
-
This is my commentary on the consolidated Lisbon treaty, working through it
line by line, containing all the amendments to the various treaties
(Maastrich...
Last orders at the bar, please
-
One of my closest friends at university who now, and for reasons entirely
unrelated to the following anecdote lives on the other side of the world,
had a f...
Tory Referendum Guarantee News (is Not News)
-
Have I been in a time warp? The blogs eg Guido Fawkes, the papers and the TVare all spouting some "news" this weekend that the supposed "tory cast iron
guar...
Lost Presumed Missing
-
From the inimitable David Forward at Tractorstats
If anyone didnt know Royal Mail are on strike today
http://rpc.technorati.com/rpc/ping http://ping.weblo...
Brutes in Suits and Hidden Angels
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Sleeping rough is extreme. There you are, lying on a hard pavement or in a
shop doorway with, at best, a thin blanket protecting you from the cold and
a pi...
Car parts factory to shed over 200 jobs
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Glamorgan Gazette
A FACTORY specialising in car parts is to shed a further 216 jobs. Harman
Becker Automotive Systems, on Bridgend Industrial Estate, will...
DLA and AA Petition Needs Your Help
-
If you are not already aware of the governments plans to scrap DLA & AA can
you sign this petition please:
http://petitions.number10.gov.uk/AttendanceA/
...
Compassion for oneself
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The issue of self-directed compassion has been coming up in a variety of
ways lately -- in my reading [in Compassion: Conceptualisations, Research
and Use ...
Overview
-
The politics of unemployment This is not a diary-type blog
As I explain in a separate blog titled Blog setup, my Blogger blogs are
really a series of w...
News.......
-
Dear friends and readers. Since I am not going to pay $85.00 to get my
Domain Name back I have moved to a new blog Beloved Dreamer II. Please give
me some ...
The Crime and Punishment for a Labour Government.
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50 hours community service for being a teenager.
£5000 a year fine for being an unemployed alcoholic. Whoops sorry a poor
unemployed alcoholic.
£150,000 a...
Were we ripped off?
-
The taxpayer built the British power stations and they were owned by
nationalised industries. The coal was mined by a nationalised industry,
supported by t...
no name
-
What next from these clowns at Westminster?? Why do we persist with this
utter nonsense. It would seem that a load of "Kids" had elected another load
of "K...
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